There is a local gal who is referred to as the Super Nanny of Whatcom County. She is fantastic! This year she came to MOPS as a speaker and I can honestly say she changed my parenting style in around an hour.
She began by playing a game with some moms. She didn't explain the game, didn't talk about the purpose of the game or how to win....she just started playing. At first it was just plain confusing, but soon we "got" it. It is NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE to play a game when you don't understand what is going on. How frequently do we do this with our children? I was great at saying "No" but not great at explaining what I expected of my son. How can I expect him to do things as expected when he doesn't even know the expectations?
The Super Nanny gave us rules to use with our kids. They are VERY simple, just 6 easy words:
-BE SAFE
-SHOW RESPECT
-USE ETIQUETTE (we changed this to manners)
At first it felt strange to say "That's not safe" instead of screaming "NO!" when my son flung himself off the back of the couch, but I kept trying. It seemed somewhat effective, but I wasn't so sure he was getting it. I wrote our family rules on the blackboard in our kitchen as a reminder (mostly a reminder for me) and one day my son pointed to them and repeated them back to me. I was kinda shocked! Once I figured out that he did indeed get it....it was on! Anytime he did anything that broke our family rules, he was asked what our rules are and then would ask which rule he broke.
Seriously, saved. my. sanity!!!
I've emailed this amazing gal to thank her for making me a better mother. Who knew 6 simple words would make such a difference in our family!
She began by playing a game with some moms. She didn't explain the game, didn't talk about the purpose of the game or how to win....she just started playing. At first it was just plain confusing, but soon we "got" it. It is NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE to play a game when you don't understand what is going on. How frequently do we do this with our children? I was great at saying "No" but not great at explaining what I expected of my son. How can I expect him to do things as expected when he doesn't even know the expectations?
The Super Nanny gave us rules to use with our kids. They are VERY simple, just 6 easy words:
-BE SAFE
-SHOW RESPECT
-USE ETIQUETTE (we changed this to manners)
At first it felt strange to say "That's not safe" instead of screaming "NO!" when my son flung himself off the back of the couch, but I kept trying. It seemed somewhat effective, but I wasn't so sure he was getting it. I wrote our family rules on the blackboard in our kitchen as a reminder (mostly a reminder for me) and one day my son pointed to them and repeated them back to me. I was kinda shocked! Once I figured out that he did indeed get it....it was on! Anytime he did anything that broke our family rules, he was asked what our rules are and then would ask which rule he broke.
Seriously, saved. my. sanity!!!
I've emailed this amazing gal to thank her for making me a better mother. Who knew 6 simple words would make such a difference in our family!
I have seen her talk before. The amazing thing is that I was ready to blow off everything she said because my parenting style is distinctly.... outside the mainstream. But actually I liked 90% of her ideas! The best thing about her is that she's not like "Super Nanny" at all, from what little I remember of that show.
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